Here’s a thing. According to my webstats, Google has, in it’s infinite wisdom, sent some poor fool searching for “Fat Asian Lesbains” to this blog. Yes, that was the spelling. I know it’s not. But anyway.
Now, I’m pretty sure I’ve never written about Fat Asian Lesbains, or even Lesbians before. Ever. So it’s that’s what you’re looking for, this post is just for you. I wouldn’t want anyone to arrive at this blog and leave feeling dissatisfied in some way. Hey, that’s customer service for you.
I wonder what Google (all praise their holy name) were thinking of. Maybe they are using a new technique which puts normal, none porn-related sites into their search results at random in the vague hope that that it’ll catch the eye of the casual Internet reader and help mend their ways. If that’s the case, it’s not working; there’s 32,900 results for “Fat Asian Lesbains” and I wasn’t even on page one (I checked. Ick. I don’t recommend it.) which means whoever was looking had to surf through a LOT of content before they hit this site. I’m probably on page 23 or something. Here’s hoping this post gets the blog the attention it deserves. Or maybe not.
Of course, Google’s search engine doesn’t quite work like that. It looks at words on the page as a whole. It looks at what links in. It looks at your star-sign, birth-date, credit card number and your entire life before finally working out what’s relevant and what’s not. Then they take a whole load of cash if you want the number one spot (allegedly). It’s clever stuff, however it works. Which still leaves me more than a little confused. Fat Asian Lesbains? I’ve likely used the word Fat. Asian, maybe. But Lesbain? Nope. Never. Until now, of course. Until now.
Oh, and if you do happen to be a Fat Asian Lesbian who can’t spell. I feel your pain. Keep looking.